king of carrot flowers (tadziobermi) wrote,
king of carrot flowers
tadziobermi

babygetlost

so for all those who think art school is easy, which most of you dont because you are in art school, the graduating class of seniors in fashion design at mass art has, in a week, gone from 14 to twelve. since the begining of sophomore year, it has dropped from 35. this shit is getting to me!
i went to school in november and came out in december, what!?Tuesday night i worked on my 3rd outfit till like 3am, then went to school and presented and it was fine. Wednesday night zoritza, becky and i stayed at school working on our CFDA/ Target competition projects all night and i didnt get back home till 11am. That equals me being in pretty much the same room for 26 hours. when i went home, i took a nap for an hour, almost didnt wake up and went to class. Then i found out i was selected as one of the six students to represent MassArt fashion in the competition, which means now i have more work to do. on monday i have the first section of my Mapping project for art since 1945, then tuesday i have 4 seaming samples, 2 godet samples, and some other thing due in coutoure techniques, my universal acceleration project in astronomy and all the corrections to my portfolio for CFDA, and essay and paperwork are due for the competition. on wednesday i have the last class of creative fashion in which we will be deciding a theme for the show and image ideas for the postcards and posters, thursday i have my resume due, as well as mock interviews for degree project. friday i have work, saturday i have work, sunday i have work. monday is the last art since 1945, tuesday is last coutoure techiques and astronomy, wednesday is my review in which my 4th garment is due as well as all other garments with corrections (all runway ready), then i work thursday-christmas.. in the span of that time i have my final presentation of my runway project including flats, illustrations, mood and fabric boards as well as theme statement, and my Mapping project is due on the 20th. I also have to clear up my still missing literary tradition credit sometime in this period.


and then i get 3 days off after christams before i start working again full time till school starts in january and then i start my 7class schedual so i can graduate.



oh my god. it just hit me how much time i need.

i am so tired. physically as well as emotionaly. my back is starting to hunch and today i had to take advil for severe neck pains i was gettign at work. i almost feel asleep standing up while i was folding tee shirts. i feel so helpless. all i want to do is write to my sister and talk to people on the phone. i feel so distressed because of so much stuff. i feel like ive lost all my friends because of all the work i have to do. i really want to be there for koya and i kills me i cant help her. i want to go out and find a boy and i cant even sacrafice two hours to go to a bar or just plain "out". my room is a mess. i think we still have fleas. i want to move in with sophie and alex, but i dont want to leave zoe behind.


i am so lost.

i dont know if i can do this for long. i think theres something wrong when one wishes to collapse from exaustion just so there is a chance to stop for a bit...

in good news, my hair was cute today.
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